If you’re like most people, you likely perceive marriage as a lifelong commitment. So, while you might have encountered some bumps in the road, you might be willing to rebuild trust, rekindle love and re-establish the mutual respect you once shared with your spouse. But what happens if you are the only one making an effort to rebuild your relationship while your partner remains deeply rooted in their unchanging ways?
When a marital relationship becomes untenable, accepting that turn of events can be a tough reality when you’re still willing to make it work. The decision to explore divorce as a way forward can be a challenge riddled with guilt and a lingering hope for reconciliation. Understanding the difficulties you may face can help you make a decision that best serves you based on your relationship’s unique circumstances.
The warning signs of an untenable marriage
Since marriage is a shared journey, both partners are required to be active participants in solving any problems that may arise. Therefore, when your partner refuses to acknowledge that your marriage is stalling, this might be a red flag you should bear in mind.
Effective communication can be challenging when your partner is adamant that the marriage is just fine, yet you believe there is a problem. Your partner may shut down or dismiss any conversations you raise concerning the health of the relationship.
Something else that might water down your efforts to work on the relationship is if your partner is unwilling to make some compromises for the marriage’s greater good. You may find that, rather than being a two-way street, your marriage becomes a one-way street where you’re giving without receiving anything back. If you’re constantly bending to your partner’s needs but they never consider what you need, you may begin to resent them for your stifled individual growth.
It can also be quite frustrating if your partner hardly makes any effort to change their negative behaviors. Some behaviors that can negatively impact your marriage may include:
- Anger management issues
- Substance abuse
- Neglecting financial responsibilities
You may perceive your partner’s unwillingness to address such behaviors as a disregard for the relationship’s well-being.
Deciding to explore divorce can be a difficult decision when you are still willing to work on your marriage. Yet, when faced with an unchanging partner, it’s important to prioritize your well-being and recognize when the relationship is causing more harm than good. Seeking appropriate legal help and preparing for the practicalities of divorce can make the transition smoother.