The holidays can be particularly difficult for divorced families, especially if you and your ex-spouse don't get along. As a parent, you want to make the best decisions for your children, but those decisions can become stressful when the holidays are involved.
Your children will probably want to know a number of things ranging from where they're going to live to where they're going to be on Christmas when you decide to divorce. Designing a holiday schedule can help you through this time of year with as few bumps in the road as possible. The first thing to consider is that this is the time of the year when you need to think about your children and not about how you would feel if they weren't with you on your holiday.
One thing you could do if there is a complication with a particular date over the holiday season is to have different days where the children celebrate the same holiday with each parent. For example, have a Christmas celebration on New Year's Eve and another on Christmas Day. Another option may be to alternate years if that won't work out. If those options don't seem good for you, considers splitting your children's winter school vacation into two and celebrating Christmas on both halves at each home.
For times like Thanksgiving, it can be hard to make up the holiday on a different day, so alternating each year may be the best way to make your children comfortable. Consider letting each parent have the children for the weekend of the holiday, since this will be less disruptive to the celebrations. Once you work out a plan, consider talking to your attorney about having it made into a true contract, so your parenting plan for the holidays is secured.
Source: Sun Sentinel, "Loud Moms: Divorce and holidays: The cheat sheet," Allyson Tomchin, LCSW, Nov. 04, 2016