An amicable divorce doesn’t have to be a pipe dream. In fact, there are many things you can do to help make your divorce more amicable. There’s no reason to have a divorce that is contentious, because a contentious divorce only takes longer and costs more. A divorce that has two people working together to negotiate has a better outcome in most cases.
How can you focus on an amicable divorce? First, start by making sure you can handle the situation without anger, frustration or bitterness. It’s no surprise that you feel upset, but approach the divorce as if it’s a business deal. The divorce itself is about getting what you need out of your marriage, not about making the other person miserable.
Another thing to remember is that if you have children, their voices matter. If they are comfortable with both parents, there’s no reason for you or the other parent to try to cut one another out of their lives. It’s wise to take into account what they want (if they’re old enough to make that decision) and then make a decision that works for everyone involved. Speaking ill of your ex in front of your children isn’t a good idea, either, since it could upset them or lead to claims of parental alienation.
When it comes down to finances, make sure you get all the documents you can together in one place. Check your credit report and statements for any unusual activity. Give this information to your attorney, so you can begin to negotiate a fair settlement.
Working out a parenting plan, settlement, alimony and other factors of your divorce together might not be easy, but it doesn’t have to turn into a war. If you and your spouse can work together, you can come out of the divorce in a more positive way.
Source: Talented Ladies Club, “The secret to an amicable divorce or separation,” accessed April 07, 2017