Divorce experts often say that parents need to put the kids first. This is, in part, why you hear parents talk about staying together for the kids. Once they have children together, they assume they can’t split up. They think that it is always going to be a negative for the kids. Is that true?
It’s not. If you in a bad marriage, it may actually be better for the children if you get divorced. They could end up feeling happier and safer than they would if you and your spouse stayed together.
Think about what it’s like for them if you’re in an abusive relationship, for example. They may have to witness fights and arguments on a regular basis. They learn from their parents, and this can shape the way they approach their own relationships when they grow up. Even when they’re young, they can experience stress, anxiety and sorrow.
If you end up getting divorced, your kids can see some very positive outcomes. They get happier parents. They get a stable home life. In cases of physical abuse, you remove them from harm’s way. You make them safe and secure. You set a good example for them and help them grow up and develop into people who are more likely to have healthy relationships of their own.
The choice is yours, of course, based on your individual situation. However, you need to accurately weigh the pros and cons. Don’t assume that you need to stay together until your kids are in college, and make sure you have an experienced family law attorney on your side.